Just a Little Something to Make Your Day...

Go on. Watch this. I DARE you not to smile the whole way through….

I love this video for MANY reasons but I love how excited she gets over the small little presents and how grateful she is for even a pack of Oreos. Not gonna lie, I cried with her...

                  You know what the best feeling is?? When you're just sitting there doing absolutely nothing but simply contemplating on life, and you suddenly realize that it's pretty dang amazing.

You’ve been through a lot, yes, but you haven’t been through it alone. Not once,

Never once,

Did you ever face anything alone. Every single step of the way, He’s been with you. And every victory that you’ve claimed has been because the Father has been with you the whole time. Time and time again, His hand has shown itself mighty.

The faithfulness of God in my life NEVER ceases to amaze me...

Autumn.

Ladies and Gentlemen....
It's here.
Or it's very close to ALMOST being here.
HOOOOORAAAAAY!!! IT'S ALMOST AUTUMN!!!!
Why do I love the fall so much?
Well....

thick scarves

Cool, gusty mornings

BOOTS

the sound of leaves crunching beneath your feet

bare trees (they're easier for climbing)

three words: PUMPKIN. SPICE. LATTE.

big bowls of soup to slurp down

carving pumpkins

love seems to always be in the air

those feelings of rushing to class, being cold and yet your face is flushed cause you're getting hot, and at the same time being so absolutely happy for absolutely no reason at all.

leggings

the GAP fall collection is always the best

yellow, orange, red and brown leaves coloring the ground

So you tell me, what's NOT to love!?

Your favorite things about the fall.
GO.

You are HERE

Moving is a hard thing to do.
It was hard when I moved across town in 7th grade and it's hard moving across the country to another state now.
I don't do well with change. There's something about it, the unfamiliarity of things that frightens me. Sometimes I say I'm adventurous. SOMETIMES. Only when I feel like it. Most times, unexplored lands scare me.

But I'm convinced that going to Mississippi to attend school is in fact what the Lord has planned for me as of now, so that's where I'm going to go.
I'm excited, but boy, am I scared.

I think of all the people that the Lord told to move. Abraham. Moses and the Israelites. My mother. And my sweet friend Alicia.
I think of them, and their lives-where they were called to go, their response, and their lives now.
They all followed His voice and direction. They all obeyed. They all saw His goodness in their lives.
Abraham became the Father of nations. Moses led an entire nation from captivity. My mother created new lives for her, her children and the generations to come. Alicia is spreading His love to the hungry people of Taiwan.
These people-changing lives and affecting generations, all because they moved.
They didn't question, they just did it. I question all the time and I'm afraid- I'm only moving to Mississippi for crying out loud!
But He spoke to me the other night as I laid in my bed.
"What are you so afraid of? Have I ever left you before? Renata, you worry too much. You spend so much time letting worry consume your mind, that you can't let it trust. I will be with you now, just like I was with you then. But you need to trust me..."
This is going to be quite the process, you know, of learning how to trust. But He's right. If I don't trust Him, I'm going to miss out on the things He has for me, beyond anything I could have ever imagined all because I let worry anchor me down.
No more.
I'm dropping that anchor forever, and I'm going to follow Him. Seeking Him. Trusting Him.
May Christ be my anchor, the very rock on which I stand and the very truth that I forever follow.

He has so much in store for me. I can already feel it. Kind of like those days when you look up at the sky and you see the clouds, you inhale all the scents of rain about to fall. It's coming. Any minute now.
That's how I feel. I will not be in the dry and weary land forever, the rain is coming. New life. Hallelujah.


May His Spirit pour into my life in such a manner that the flood causes an overflow into the people around me. Because when it comes to the Kingdom of God, when it rains, it POURS.
This heart is ready.
Onward!

paint.

The Pulley Effect

"He must become greater and I must become less and less."

*John 3:30*

It's ironic isn't it? That the sure sign of growth is by decreasing.

It's because we become too full. We become too full of other things that we leave no room for Jesus to come in.

We are too full of pride, bulge with selfishness and we leave no room for Him to come in and work within us. 

So this is what John says that there must be more of Him and less of me-it's the Pulley Effect.


Let me explain.


It's simple, really. The more you tug on one side of the pulley, the less you have of the other.

The more I have of myself, the less I have of Him but the more I rid myself of me, the more I have of Him. 

Take a look....

That's what I want. I want the Holy Spirit to overtake my heart in such a way, that it drives all the gunk out. All of my selfishness, my anger, my wounds, my desires for independence that enable me to think I can do it alone. I want it all gone so that there is room for the Spirit to fill. That His light may come with such a force that the darkness that hides in the smallest corners be driven out so that it may no longer I that live, but Christ who lives within me. It's not a  better or more improved me, it's simply no longer me.

Jesus, here I am. Broken, unworthy, and so incredibly desperate for You. 
It's all yours. All of it, Yours.
May my life no longer be dictated by my selfish thoughts, but rather be filled with Your overwhelming love and mercy that would enable my hands and feet to move in obedience to Your voice.
May You be lifted high in my life Lord, in everything, be lifted high. That I may have none of me left, but all of You.

It's like the old hymn that sings 

"O Jesus Christ, Grow Thou in me

And all things else recede"

My Buttons for YOUR Blog!!

here they are!! aren't they just cuuuute as a "button?"??

TOO DOO CHHHHHHHHH!

I know, I know, that was an AWFUL pun but I couldn't just pass up the chance to say it ya know??

If you want one, because you know, it'll look soooo perfect on your page of "Blogs I Love", copy and paste the code where you see these images on the right of my blog! Spread the love by spreading the buttons!! Wait, that doesn't make sense...whatever, it's 1am and I don't even know what I'm saying to be honest. Just get the buttons, okay? Or I'll have to ramble on with more nonsense...

Here Comes the Sun

You know what I love?? And you may think I'm absolutely out of my mind, buuut... I really love waking up early in the mornings- I'm talking like 3:30am and heading out the door by 4am. Am I out of my mind?? Yes, I think I am somewhat, seeing how I'm not quite THAT awake just yet. But I get in my car and I drive. There's never a premeditated destination, there's never a time limit, never even a sense of time itself. It's just me in my car with some music. Some mornings it's worship music, other's its the soothing vocals of Billie Holiday or the happy trumpet of Louis Armstrong falling into the silence of the empty highway and all other musicians your grandparents used to listen to or even the instrumentals of Explosions in the Sky. I just drive.
But thanks to recent rising gas prices, I don't have the luxury of just driving aimlessly so instead I find a place to go to and then sit in my car and I watch the sun rise. It's always amazing to me, as the sun breaks through the bleakness and dark sky. It just slowly pierces through and all of a sudden, the darkness is pulled back and the colors flood in. Blue, purple, orange, pink. They're not the shades that you can find in a Crayola crayon box but theyre new. Every single day the shades are new. And they're smeared across the sky. It's always fun to look at. I kind of think that God isn't super precise on it, I think He just gets creative. Kind of like when you're a kid and you play with fingerpaint. You don't ever have a certain picture in your mind, you just know that you're having fun dipping your fingers in the wet paint and let them do the creating. I feel like God's like that sometimes. Just kind of like "Let's see what I can do today..."
And I'm amazed by it. Seriously, I stare into the sky until a new shade appears and my excitement bubbles up.

This morning was especially wonderful.
I looked up into the sky and I was so taken aback, my breath left my body.
And I soaked in the warm air and the colors, I gave thanks to Him for the beauty He allowed me to see. I think He does stuff like that, little things like painting the sky because He knows how much joy it brings me. And then He said to me, in the smallest voice:

"Do you like it??"
"Yes Lord, its absolutely amazing."
and like an excited parent giving their child a really good gift, He replied,
"Good. I was hoping you would. I did it for you, you know..."

My heart was filled with absolutely filled with joy.
He did it for me. For my own enjoyment. The wholeeee sky, He made for me.


some songs I listen to...

The soothing jazz...


The heartwarming instrumentals...


The song of praise...

Fin.

I did it guys. 
I walked the stage, I moved my tassel, I threw my hat in the air....I OFFICIALLY graduated high school. 
I can now say that I am a Churchill High School alumni.

"Never, Never Give Up..."- Winston Churchill

This is it peoples...

The last day. My OFFICIAL last day of high school. I'm graduating in less than a week. 
Seriously?? Less than a week?? I mean, SERIOUSLY!?!?!?!?


I'm not sure how I feel about all of this.
Sure, this means no more taking excruciating tests, stupid quizzes, gross cafeteria food,  (for NOW...granted, I will be in college in a few months...) mean custodians, getting up at unreasonable times in the a.m, freaky substitutes who try to convince you they control the weather, etc...


But this also means no more sneaking off campus for lunch with friends, making jokes at my assistant principal as I run late to class, singing the school song after soccer games on the bus, making pancakes in the locker room, hearing the ghetto girl mama drama talks in the A Hallway bathroom, football games, 8am pep rallies, FCA meetings, hanging out with my favorite teachers in their classrooms, getting to really know all of the students in my classes, and freaky substitutes who try to convince you they control the weather...

It's all so bittersweet.

My goodness. I'm growing up. 

Wait, no, I take that back.

I AM grown up.

My goodness....

"Every new beginning comes from some other beginnings end..."- Closing Time

But hey, you know what? I did it. Thumbs up for that....

Countdown to Graduation: 20 Days

So, in order to help the time go by faster from now until the time I walk across the stage, I decided I would post one random blog a day that can be about absolutely anything. A.NY.THING.
So here goes....T-Minus 20 days, Blog Post #1:



Movie Review: Something Borrowed (2011)

Based on a novel by Emily Griffin, this movie is to be considered a "chick flick", so if you want to test out if you're boyfriend truly loves you or not, ask him to go see it. It's a cruel test, asking a man to the act of de-manning himself by not only going to see this movie with you, but paying to sit through those gruesome two hours and a half of it too. hehe
     He probably won't like it, but you (if you're a girl) YOU, my friend, will LOVEEEE it. I'm not going to talk much more about it because I don't want to give anything away, but basically its the story of two lifelong best friends, Rachel White and Darcy Rhone. Rachel, is the more studious and realistic one of the two while Darcy is the wild, obnoxious party girl. Rachel introduces Darcy to her now fiancee, Dexter Thaler, whom she went to law school with. One night after an emotional celebration party of her 30 year birthday, a drunk Rachel confesses her feelings for her friend Dexter and then SHAZAM! Something happens between the two that is what they think a DEFINITE mistake...or is it?? Now, Rachel must decide between loyalty in her friendship to Darcy which always has something to do with giving up Rachel's own desires for Darcy to be happy, or actually doing something for once that is what Rachel wants. LOVE!

and that's all I'm going to tell you.

I loved this movie so much, I watched it once and then walked right out to the ticket booth and bought the another ticket for the very next showing.
Sad isn't it?? No, not really. I loved it just as much the second time around than the first. I don't regret it at allllll.


So here are some reasons
WHY I ABSOLUTELY LOVED THE MOVIE:

1. Killer soundtrack. Like FORREALS. I went home and downloaded all of the songs that I didn't already have on my iTunes. All the songs were BEAUTIFUL and perfectly selected for each scene. And they brought me memories.... "How's It Gonna Be"-Third Eye Blind and "Round Here"-Counting Crows were some that made me pretty happy as they brought me back to the good ol' days of the 90's.
2. Colin Egglesfield- Oh. My. God.That's all that I could manage to say when I saw him first appear on screen. JUST LOOK AT THE MAN!! He was Dexter Thaler in the movie but he is my future husband in real life. He just doesn't know it yet. That's okay, he'll know soon enough. Seriously though, he's Ah-DORABLE!! His laugh gave me the giggles, his smile made me melt in my seat and the way he chases after Rachel made me sigh. I'm telling ya, IT'S LOVE!!!!! I really think God was just showing off when he made him. I think He thought, "Hey, watch this. I'm gonna blow EVERYONE'S MIND with this next one..."When he first came out, I looked at the ceiling, with two VERY big thumbs up and whispered, "Well done, Lord, well done...."
3. Philosophy. No, I'm not saying that I agree with the main plot, I'm saying that it made me realize a few things about my own life. How some opportunites have come before me but I was too scared to take them because I felt unworthy of such an opportunity and I let them slip away. CARPE DIEM!!!!
4. I'm moving to New York City. I'm not sure when (probably when I graduate from college) but I'm packing my bags and going to NYC to live there. I'm not sure for how long, but I really am going to do it. Why, you ask? WELL WHY NOT??? NYC, here I come...in four years.
5. Hilarious yet Realistic. Yeah, the movie was actually REALLY funny! The dialogue was so real and had me laughing the entire time. The scenes were all believeable and somehow worked, like a dancing one where Rachel wants to dance sexy and makes an attempt to grind. It was funnier because, IT WAS LIKE I WAS WATCHING MYSELF ON SCREEN!!! Especially Jim Krasinki's character, Ethan. You gotta love him and you immediately want a friend like him.

la la la

Here are a few songs that if you haven't already heard, you should. And if you haven't downloaded them into your iPod after, CHOP CHOP!!!

They're what I've currently been listening too. These particular all have a sweet, sorrowful and beautiful melody that somehow found their way and nestled inside my heart. They kind of sum up life for me right now. whatever that means. 

So listen and love, my friends. As you sip your coffee or sing in your car!

Ta ta for now!

Name a few songs that sum up life for you at the moment. It can be "Hit me Baby (One more time)", Backstreet Boys, Coldplay- Any song. I promise I'll listen to them!

MOTH'S WINGS- PASSION PIT

DELICATE-DAMIEN RICE

BEACH BABY-BON IVER

WHAT SARAH SAID- DEATH CAB FOR CUTIE

Proverbs of Pooh

As I'm about to head off for college, I sit here and I can't help but think.

I can't help but think of how different my life is going to be and how even though I've been alive for the past 18 years, in a way life is just now starting. Weird.

The truth is, I'm terrified. 

I'm terrified of going to college, especially away to college. It's like a concoction of excitement, terror, and bittersweet sorrow, all blended together to create my feelings now. 

I will say though, that even though I am extremely scared to venture off, I have to say that I have the full assurance that I'm not going into the unknown. 

Yes, it is unknown for me, but the truth is, Jesus has already gone out before me and prepared the way! I just have to follow. And even when it will seem like He's hidden from my sight when things get hard and cloudy, like the old hymnal sings, "I rest on His unchanging grace."

So yes I'm excited. And yes I'm absolutely terrified. Either way though, I know it's going to be an adventure.

And there's no way I'm passing up on that.

"A grand adventure is about to begin..."
-winnie the pooh


I couldn't have said it better myself, you old bear.

Mon Amie. Mi Amiga. My Friend.

You know how you have that friend, that ONE friend who you swear you're related to?

The one who's been through hell and back with you holding your hand the whole way?


The one who knows you more than you sometimes even know yourself?


Who can read your every facial expression and thought or tell how you're REALLY doing by your simple "Hello?" on the phone?

The one who makes you laugh so hard, you spit out your water AND almost pee your pants?


The one who is willing to scarf down 5 brownies with you without regrets?


The one who pushes you and encourages you through the stormiest and hardest times of your life, telling you to keep going and pointing to the light at the end of the tunnel?


The one who will drop everything and go pick you up no matter where you are at whatever time at night?



The one who you can tell your deepest secrets to, and be absolute confident that she won't breathe out a single word?


The one who will tell you the truth, no matter how badly you DON'T want to hear it?


The one who always checks on you to make sure you're not feeling out of place at a party where there's a bunch of people you don't know?


The one who texts you random texts telling you how great you are and how much they value you?


The one who is honest enough to say "PLEASE tell me you're not wearing that..."and spare you the embarrassment?


The one who sacrifices their Saturdays to help you prepare for Prom or Homecoming and making sure she intimidates you're date keeps his hands to himself?

*yeah, they REALLY dressed like cheap hairdressers, and then met my date like that...

That friend for me is Maria Jose Fernandez.

She is probably one of the most amazing people I've ever met in my whole life.


Not only is she all of those things I mentioned above, for me, she's that and so much more to so many other people.

She's basically my sister. But she's also my very bestest of the bestest friend.
Even though we grew up together, it wasn't until when she was a sophomore in high school, she reached out  and befriended the nerdy awkward middle schooler me. I never really knew why though, all I know is that I was beyond ecstatic that a HIGH SCHOOLER who was actually cool wanted to hangout with ME. And that's where it all began.
I don't know what I would've done without her for the years that followed. She's gotten me through so much, just by being there for me when I needed a friend, an encourager, a shoulder.
 I love her more than words can say and I don't think I will ever be able to really express how much she impacted my life. I literally wouldn't be able to find the words. The beauty within her heart and her spirit make her absolutley radiant, not to mention the fact that she's a TOTAL babe.
;)

She never judges me, no matter how many times I manage to make a total fool of myself (whether by my actions or with my words) and she manages to find it in her heart to love me anyway. How? I don't know. I would've ditched my weirdo self a longgg time ago, but she didn't. And I'm confident that she WON'T. And I can't thank her enough. Every time I'm with her, I can't help but sit in wonder at what I could have possibly done to deserve such a great friend.




Her laughter can infect a whole room of strangers and just being near her brings joy to those around.


Her love for Jesus is undeniable.


This woman overflows with skilled talent and passion.
Truth be told, when I was 5 years old, I wished I could be exactly like her.
Nothing has changed. She's my inspiration.
She's changed my life. Forever. Just by being who she is. Just by being my friend. Just by loving me. Isn't that just amazing?
Yeah, it's because she truly is.

Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive. 

 ~Anäis Nin

Thank you Maria, for being a part of my world.

 Not only being a part of it, but help creating it too.

I love you to the moon...and back.

Just Around Town...

Luminaria Lights Festival & Art Show at Downtown San Antonio

Random Ramblings

9 Random Things About Me:

I prefer to wear ballet flats over heels any day.

• I have a weird, (BUT STRONG) anti-deli feelings. Subway, Quiznos. Schlotzky's. I hate them. I just don't understand why I would pay $8 or even $5 for a sandwich when i could easily make it at my home for free. (yeah, yeah...fellas, this is where you  can make alllll those jokes about women belonging in the kitchen, making sandwiches all day for a living....)

• Writing letters. I write to  to people across the country, to people across the city, to my mom across the hall. I find it more personal and much cuter than any email or Facebook message.

• Some days, when I feel like it's been "one of those days" or when I'm so happy I feel like I could skip everywhere I go,  I watch "When Harry Met Sally". I watch it all the way through until the very end- you know, when Harry runs to Sally at the New Year's party and tell her he loves her? AND THEN GRABS HER AND KISSES HER!?!? Yeah, I rewind that part about 7 times. AT LEAST. Look, watch it for yourself and see what I mean...
• I would like to write a book someday. 3 of them, actually.

•  I like waking up in the morning, and not just at like 9 a.m. I'm talking like, waking up while everyone else is asleep. I  throw on a sweater, drive around with the windows down and I stick my left arm out the window, letting the wind move it like a wave. Or sometimes, I sit on the cool grass outside, letting its wetness seep into my clothes while drinking hot tea. Either way, whether I'm in my own backyard or driving along the highway, I like to play worship music and exult my Creator as the morning colors begin to tint the sky and the day unfolds. It brings me so much wonder and leaves me in total awe.

• I think public school teachers are the biggest unsung heroes of America.
•  I run. but not because i like it.

• Sometimes, I like to speak in a British accent for a whole day and go places talking to strangers in that accent. They ask where I'm from and I usually say England. Then I ask where the "loo" is, because i know thats what they call the restroom over in Britain-it adds to authenticity.

         So now friends, what are some random things about you?  Go on, don't be shy to tell...

Free Wheelin' Dylans

My brother looks a lot like Bob Dylan.


The hair.

The clothes.

(He copied Bob Dylan of course)
They even walk with the same hop in their step. Not in an arrogant way, in a-take-a-stroll-through-life-easy-going kind of way.


The resemblance is almost unreal.

It's kinda cool really, having a brother that looks like a legendary music icon.
And he's not only that, but he's just an amazing guy all around. A follower of Jesus, a creator of music, a composer of words, and of course, the funniest guy in the world (seriously, he made me pee my pants from laughing...)
Passion, love and joy drive him. He lives his life impacting those around him, though I'm not really sure he sees that.
He's also the reason I haven't gotten asked out by any guys over the past 4 years of my high school career. He is feared I tell ya...
He's pretty much my best friend. He knows me better than anyone ever.
That's kinda cool too.
Anyways, I looove him.
And maybe this has to do with why I've started listening to Bob Dylan fairly recently.
Because I miss having him around the house now that he's got his own place and I rarely see him.
And when I listen to old Robert Zimmerman (Ol' Bobby's real real name btw) I hear my brother singing along to him in the background, as he's driving along stretches of highways,
like a rolling stone,
but he ain't goin' nowhere.

Love Is Never A Stagnant Pool

Background Story:

At the after school program I work with, there's a girl named Megan.

                                  Let's call her Megan shall we?

She used to somewhat annoy me because she would always follow me around and was extremely clingy and a couple of weeks ago she came up to me to talk to me. In that talk, she revealed to me so much that my view on her was changed. Jesus gave me COMPLETELY new eyes to see her in. She was no longer a pest, an annoyance, she was just a really hurt little girl. She explained how she spent the majority of her days with her dad, "the biggest meaniest man in the world" because he always errupted and responded with anger, shouting or spankings for the smallest things. So obviously, she was always scared of him.

Her mom worked late into the nights and would make it home only to find her brother and her asleep. Once she gave them kisses and left the room, Megan would sneak into the hallway and listen to the discussions late at night. She told me her dad hurt her feelings once when she overheard her mother tell him "But she's only seven years old!" where her dad responded "But she's SO annoying!"

I can't imagine the heart break she felt when she heard her own dad say that his own daughter was annoying, the thing she heard everyone else throughout the day label her as was affirmed by her daddy.

"So I never talk to anyone. My parents always say “Not now”, and I don't have any friends. I really don't. They all think that I'm weird and when I want to play with them they run away. So I talk to myself... BUT THAT MAKES THEM THINK I'M WEIRDER!!!"

                     I listened. I listened to her frustrations and confessions of loneliness and rejection and having no worth in the eyes of anyone. I listened to her hurts as they surfaced the more she talked. I told her "But you know that your parents love you right??" and she said, "They used to tell me, but they barely never tell me anymore." Awkwaaaaaard. What can you say to that? So I said,"But you know that I love you right? So very much! I think you're a neat girl who is smart, BEAUTIFUL, funny, and has the prettiest hair I've ever seen!"

           Her face lit up suddenly.

"And did you know that Jesus loves you even more than I love you!?! His love for you, makes my love seem like nothing! That's how much it is!"

           Her face was a vision. It was joy, amazement, astonishment and disbelief all at once. I told her to talk to me anytime she wanted. Anytime. Even if she just wanted to tell me about her day, no matter how good or bad it was."Sometimes,” I told her, “we won't be able to talk though. But when that happens, did you know that you can always talk to Jesus?"

"But HOW?! He's not even here! How do we know if He's really listening?"

I explained that she could talk to Him like He was sitting right there, next to us, to tell Him how she felt and He really does He hear even if it seems like we're talking to a wall.

"Sometimes," I said, "I tell Jesus whenever I'm super scared or sad or angry. I just say 'Jesus, you need to help me because my mom is yelling at me and I don't know what to do but I'm scared. But I know You're the only one who can help me, so Jesus, please help me feel that You're here with me, and help me calm me down.' and He ALWAYS DOES! You might not feel it right away, it's not magical, but just keep talking to Him, He'll make you feel safe and you won't even be scared. And He speaks to you in your heart. Not like a voice, but you can like, feel Him in your heart. "

"So. I can talk to Him whenever I want...? Andddd....He hears me?"

"Yup."

It was hard for her to grasp, a little frustrating too since she asked why we couldn't see Him, but I sensed her hope in what I said. As she left to go home, before she reached the door, she yelled out "WAIT!!!! CAN I TALK TO HIM IN MY HEAD TOO!?!?"

SO THE OTHER DAY:

I was walking down a hallway, holding her hand, and I asked her how things were going at home and she responded:

"Well actually, things are better. 'Cause that one time me and you talked, remember? I talked to God that night. And then the next day, my dad started yelling at me and my brother again, and I 'membered what you said, so in my head I told God that I was scared and that I needed Him to help me not be scared and then a little bit later, my dad stopped yelling and I wasn't even scared anymore. I told my mom how I talked to you and how I talked to God and my daddy doesn't yell anymore. Sometimes he gets mad, but then he calms down and doesn't yell or spank us anymore. He's nice now. The other day, I told him to have a good day as I got out of the car and you know what he said??! He said “You too! Love you!” 'Member how you said that He hears me? He does! I know so 'cause He made my daddy stop yelling. Ms. Renata, I talk to God all the time now! I tell Him everything and sometimes, I fall asleep in the middle of us talking at night. I feel Him in my heart. I feel like He's talking too. But not a lot, just a little. But it's kind of like being friends at first. I know what you're talking about Ms. Renata! Sometimes, I even hear Him tell me not to do bad things or how to be nice to my daddy. And one night, when I was scared of my closet, my daddy just shut the door but I still couldn't go to sleep, so then, I started telling God that I was scared and I just fell asleep."

 I didn't even know what to do. I literally couldn't speak because I was overwhelmed by so many emotions. I was so proud of her, so awe filled that God made Himself so real to her in things that seemed small, but that in her seven year old mind seemed huge. That being in the transformation of her dad and falling asleep after being terrified of her closet. I was so excited that she heard Him, so full of joy and ecstasy, and amazed at the way He broke into her family's relationships.

I told her to go down to the playground and assured her that I would be down in a sec. As she hopped down the stairs, I went into the bathroom and cried!!! Because I was SO AMAZED AT THE WAY THE FATHER MADE HIMSELF KNOWN- in the transformation of her dad and even in having peace after being terrified of her closet.

           Mainly, I was so amazed at how deeply the love of Christ penetrated through the rejection, the sadness, the lies and the wounds the enemy tried to instil in this little girl. I was filled with awe and astonishment, at the way His glory and power were manifested through the life of a seven year old girl, who for the first time in her life, is experiencing the love of Jesus and what it's like to be accepted in Him, and I was watching His hand orchestrate this all before my very eyes.

 Praise be to Him, who's constantly at work in our lives and making Himself known! He is the light that breaks down the walls darkness tries to build. He is our source of life that floods our hearts with joy!

Our hope.

          Our refuge.

                   Our healer.

                               Our Father.

This is the Kingdom of God. And it is real. And it is moving.

Thank you Jesus, for letting me be a part of it.

He NEVER ceases to amaze me